ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW - DVD review

It's hard to believe people ever lived slower lives—especially at a time when folks can't seem to spend a single moment without fidgeting with their palm pilots or yakking on cell phones in walk-and-talks that, despite their content ("I'm on my way to the grocery store now"), are conducted with "West Wing" importance. If you need a refresher course in slowing down—how to drive a car, wait for someone, or walk down the street without feeling you need to "multitask"—watch "The Andy Griffith Show."

In episode after episode, Sheriff Andy Taylor (Griffith) and his deputy, Barney Fife (Don Knotts), often sit side-by-side in quiet contemplation, listening to the radio, playing music and humming, or reading separate books, talking only occasionally while they otherwise savor the silence. The plots are less complicated too. Though contemporary sitcoms will weave together three or more storylines in every episode, with "Andy Griffith" it was always just one thing. That's the secret of life that cowboy Curly imparts to Billy Crystal's dude-ranch character in "City Slickers," and it was a successful formula for this popular show, which continues to win recognition long after its eight-season run. Most recently, it won a PGA Hall of Fame Award and a TV-Land Legend Award.

If Mayberry was everybody's favorite small town in the Sixties—an "I Like Ike" oasis in a decade of turmoil—it's still a nostalgic favorite that proves you can go home again if the home town is as idyllic as this North Carolina berg. The most serious things that the sheriff and his deputy had to deal with were escaped convicts—so many, actually, that you'd swear that Mayberry was part of a criminal underground railway. Otherwise, it was harmless never-hit-anyone town drunks, bullies, two-bit con artists, speeders, small-time moonshiners, less-than-ideal dates, bad habits, and the kind of insignificant problems that dominate a normal family's days. They were stereotypes—the sagely sheriff, the bumbling deputy, the comic drunk (which now, with our sensitized awareness of alcoholism, can feel a bit awkward), the barber as dull as his scissors, the attractive schoolteacher, and the naïve mechanic—but sincere and inspired performances made them fun to watch week after week.

By the fifth season, though, writers started to run out of things to do in this small town. When in doubt, their plots seemed to default to variations on a theme: Barney's weakness is exploited or his status as a respected lawman is threatened; Andy's Aunt Bee (Frances Bavier) has another unsuitable suitor; Andy's son, Opie (Ron Howard), has girl or peer problems; town-drunk Otis (Hal Smith) needs reforming again; Gomer-replacement Goober (George Lindsay) bumbles his way in and out of a tight spot; or, when all else fails, bring the bluegrass-pickin' Darlings or that rhyming rock-throwing lunatic, Ernest T. Bass (Howard Morris) down from the hills. That's my only complaint about Season Five: it feels like we've seen it all before. That said, the public didn't seem to mind when the show first aired. "The Andy Griffith Show" finished in the Top 10 shows every year of its eight-year run, finishing #5 this season behind "The Beverly Hillbillies," "Bonanza," "The Dick Van Dyke Show," and "Petticoat Junction." But three rural comedies and an escapist western say a lot about what the public wanted to watch the season that JFK was assassinated.

Here's a brief description of the 32 black-and-white episodes (total runtime 13 hours 34 minutes):

1) "Opie Loves Helen"—It's suddenly father and son competing in a romantic triangle when Opie gets a crush on his teacher.

2) "Barney's Physical"—It looks like Barney's career as a lawman is over, until Andy and the gang decide to fatten him up and stretch him out to meet the new physical requirements.

3) "Family Visit"—When Aunt Bee's sister and her loutish husband visit with their kids, it's just about all anyone in the Taylor household can stand.

4) "The Education of Ernest T. Bass"—Andy talks Helen into taking on the crude-and-rude Bass as a new pupil in her class. And another teacher crush ensues.

5) "Aunt Bee's Romance"—An old beau of Bee's is so disliked by Andy and Opie that the sheriff just might cave in to the man's subtle extortion attempt.

6) "Barney's Bloodhound"—In this funny-but-predictable episode, Barney is determined to teach a part-hound mutt to track criminals, but the dog ends up being n escaped con's best friend . . . until he whistles.

7) "Man in the Middle"—Barney and Thelma Lou squabble and Andy and Helen get so caught in the middle that all four of them end up fighting.

8) "Barney's Uniform"—In another quintessential bully episode, Barney wears his uniform constantly after a man he ticketed threatens to break every bone in his body if he ever catches him out of uniform.

9) "Opie's Fortune"—Easy come, easy go as Opie finds a wallet with $50 in it and buys all sorts of stuff . . . before the owner shows up.

10) "Goodbye Sheriff Taylor"—In one of several episodes that has Andy thinking of leaving for greener pastures, Barney proves instantly that he's not ready to move up to the top job.

11) "The Pageant"—Another disappointed mediocrity story as the no-talent Aunt Bee has her heart on playing Miss Mayberry in the centennial pageant.

12) "The Darling Baby"—The Darlings roll into town, with Mr. Darling (Denver Pyle) insisting that Opie become betrothed to wed his three-month-old granddaughter when they both come of age.

13) "Andy and Helen Have Their Day"—Barney jumps the gun and gets a wedding party together when Andy calls him from another town's justice of the peace and says he needs Barney to bring money—for a fishing fine.

14) Three Wishes for Opie"—Barney buys an old lamp and he and Opie try the Aladdin approach . . . with the usual disappointments and lessons.

15) "Otis Sues the County"—When Otis falls in the jail and Barney insists on him filing accident paperwork, his by-the-book deputying backfires when an ambulance-chasing attorney gets Otis to sue.

16) "Barney Fife, Realtor"—It's a tale of honesty in business after Opie cheats a schoolmate and Barney isn't much better as he tries to downplay a house's flaws to buyers.

17) "Goober Takes a Car Apart"—Don't ask how (it's Mayberry) but Goober picks the wrong time to work on car parts all over the courthouse-sheriff's office. Andy is on his way back from a conference, and colleagues are planning a visit.

18) "The Rehabilitation of Otis"—Otis's drunkenness gets out of hand as he pulls a Mongo and rides through town on a cow, thinking it a horse, and Barney's attempts to play shrink drive Otis to take his business elsewhere.

19) "The Lucky Letter"—Barney may lose his job again, this time over a broken chain letter that hexes Barney right before his pistol-shooting certification.

20) "Goober and the Art of Love"—There's nothing worse than a fifth wheel, as Goober starts to tag along with Andy, Helen, Barney, and Thelma Lou. And there's only one thing to do.

21) "Barney Runs for Sheriff"—Another job offer for Andy has Barney running for election, but when that job falls through, guess who he's running against?

22) "If I Had a 1/4 Million"—In a very funny and classic episode (again reminiscent of others), Barney sets up a trap to catch a crook and nets an FBI agent instead.

23) "TV or Not TV"—An article about Andy brings a film crew to town to tell his story, but then Andy notices the crew seems to care as much about the bank as anything else.

24) "Guest in the House"—The daughter of Aunt Bee's friend stays with the Taylors and gets a crush on Andy, whose reaction is bringing Helen to a slow boil.

25) "The Case of the Punch in the Nose"—Stickler Barney wants to reopen a case between Floyd the barber and his friend, but he ends up starting the feud all over again.

26) "Opie's Newspaper"—Opie's entrepreneurial spirit gets the best of andy and Aunt Bee as he spices up his newspaper with family gossip.

27) "Aunt Bee's Invisible Beau"—Bee's latest interest spells not only trouble, it spells B-I-G-A-M-Y as well.

28) "The Arrest of the Fun Girls"—Fans will remember the fun girls from Mt. Pilot, who complicate the boys' dating lives again when they're arrested . . . and Andy and Barney decide to tell them their prisoners are hardened criminals instead.

29) "The Luck of Newton Monroe"—When Andy arrests a traveling salesman, he ends up having to help piece the fellow back together again.

30) "Opie Flunks Arithmetic"—Andy and Helen disagree over how to handle Opie's failing grades.

31) "Opie and the Carnival"—Opie gets cheated at a shooting gallery, and it takes the eagle-eyed sheriff to teach the carney a lesson.

32) "Banjo Playing Deputy"—Another down-on-his luck story has Andy tries to help a banjo player whose job Andy lost.

Video: As with previous releases, the aspect ratio is 1.33:1, and the black-and-white picture is good but not great. There's a slight graininess, with some episodes a little worse. That said, you really have to be critically looking at it to notice. When you're caught up in the narrative flow, it's nothing bothersome.

Audio: The audio is nothing special—a Dolby Digital Mono that at least sounds natural and has an even distribution across the center and front main speakers. In other words, no complaints.

Extras: There are no extras.

Bottom Line: Season Five isn't vintage "Andy Griffith Show," because so many of the plots seem recycled from earlier seasons. But all the other hallmarks are there: the endearing characters, spot-on performances, and plots that contain simple messages about goodness and making good choices. For entertainment, it's still better than most of what passes for sitcoms these days, and a reminder that you don't have to have that cell phone turned on every minute. Slow down. Live.